A letter from parents to their son who is due to receive the sacrament of Confirmation

To our dear son Marc,                                                                                  22 April 2018

Confirmation is set for exactly one month’s time and the days are flying by.

Almost all preparations for the day of Confirmation and for the celebration dinner are done.

Whilst all the logistics are in place, the most important consideration is whether your Confirmation in the Catholic Church is what you really want. Confirmation is not a decision to be taken lightly.

The fact that we are going out of our way to make it memorable, is not only because we love you as our son, but more importantly to emphasise the importance of the action and statement you will make through the act of receiving the sacrament Confirmation.

When you were baptised, we took the responsibility to share our faith with you, and sometimes we believe we did it well, and sometimes we realise now that we could have done it differently, but we always did it as best we knew at the time.

Confirmation is the moment you will be stating publicly that you accept the teachings of our faith, the beliefs we as your parents have imparted to you, and that this is the manner in which you wish to continue for the REST of your life. This is a huge commitment and we would like you to know that we do not wish you to do this to please us, but because you are convinced it is the truth you wish to live by.

The fact that we raised you in a certain way, even though we ourselves are convinced that it is the right way, is not enough reason for you to be Confirmed. You must believe from the depths of your soul.

An anointing with Sacred Chrism will be traced on your forehead, and that is one of the powerful symbols of the Church. It is used to baptise, to consecrate a Church, and at the ordination of a priest. Never underestimate the power of this action and the immense power of the oil of Chrism. We were privileged to be at the Mass on Holy Thursday this year, when the Chrism with which you will be confirmed was blessed. We thought of you that moment.

We would rather you delay your confirmation than have you receive to insincerely or unworthily. Confirmation calls us to practice our faith and to committed action as witnesses of Jesus. To not intend to actively live out ones Confirmation promises is to receive it unworthily. Remember that always. You will make your solemn commitment publicly, standing before the community of believers, and by kneeling before the high ‘authority of the Bishop, who on behalf of Mother Church, will impart the seal, the gift of the Holy Spirit, which is more valuable than any other material possession in life. Therefore, please be very conscious of what you are undertaking.

Should you for any reason decide not to go ahead with confirmation, despite all the preparation you and we have done, that is fine with us. Be assured of this. We will not pressure you to get confirmed. The same would apply to your possible marriage one day, or if you opted for religious life or the priesthood.

We would be honoured of course, to watch you being Confirmed, but we will love you no less if you don't, and we would not consider our efforts in guiding you towards this commitment wasted, because you are a unique and free individual, with great potential, and created by God for a special purpose in any case. If you do decide to go ahead, try and make every effort to enter deeply into the moment as it is something that will never be repeated. It will be difficult on the day with all the activities and emotion, but when you kneel before the Bishop, it is something between you and God. So, for that minute, concentrate, forget everything and everyone around you - family, friends, cameras, whatever – and just enter into the presence of God. Experience his majesty and love for you.

We are sure that you have given much thought to Confirmation, but again we beg you to profoundly contemplate and consider what it implies for your whole future. Don't any further preparations that are being planned by the parish and catechists pressurise you or stress you, or distract you from the essentials. Take some time out daily, and in your quite moments, focus on what you are undertaking and its seriousness so that you can fully celebrate. Feel free to share with us whether you have some doubts and decide not to go ahead. Meanwhile we will continue as if you will receive the Sacrament, but can call off our plans even the day before. Whatever decision you make will be the right one for you.

You can also go talk with Aunty Kate who was your baptism sponsor, and Aunty Ursula, whom you have chosen as witness to your commitment as your confirmation sponsor on behalf of the people of God.

We are praying for you Marc, that God will keep you in his love and tender care always.

May God bless you lots, Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

With all our love,      Mom and Dad